The author is a former speechwriter and journalist, mother of a large family, who undertakes a fascinating examination of a defect that so many secretly like having: being perfectionists. She coined the expression “spiritual perfectionist” and shows in detail how it reflects a particular vision of a fault-finding God, who is never satisfied by what we do, and demands of us certain behaviour before he will concede us his love. She identifies today’s Tiger Moms and Helicopter Coaches, work martyrs who won’t take their vacation days and exercise addicts who anguish over workouts. The demand for perfection is the unifying theme that connects “our soaring rates of pharmaceutical addictions and eating disorders, our escalating levels of anxiety and depression, our epidemic of credit card debt and the explosive popularity of cosmetic surgery.” She reveals how great saints dealt with this tendency, like St. Jane de Chantal, St. Francis de Sales, or Alphonso di Liguori. Particularly fascinating is how this proclivity in many souls lead to different expressions of rigourism and Jansenism that trickled down into the pews and explains much of the French Revolution’s anti-clericalism, as well as secularization in our own day.
She writes beautifully, and manages to weave in and out of the stories of the saints her own struggle with perfectionism and how she found peace in divine filiation. It’s a fascinating and enjoyable read that will strike a chord with many struggling to live a life of piety, yet hampered by comparison games, demands to control all outcomes, or seeking approval from others. She says women are particularly prone to this, but men don’t get a pass either. Other saints include Ignatius of Loyola, St. Benedict of Nursia, St. Francis of Assisi, and the meaning of devotion to the Sacred Heart in the Church. She also shows the dire consequences to perfectionists who even become heretics, and dedicates a chapter to Angélique Arnaud, an abbess of the monastery of Port-Royal, a stronghold of Jansenism. It is a highly recommended read, particularly to help open up the deeper dimensions of the ascetical struggle.